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TIME IN LIFE first cut-up of my own books* Media can’t keep up with all the killing car doors swing open on Portage Avenue I do not find this reassuring though there are days filled with ants and rot the wild geese are gone. Inclined to the sky the Cockshut wheel reels in the blue

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There is really nothing wrong with you. When can I see you next?

Yesterday I met two wonderful mental health professionals. The first was a female psychiatrist, my first woman psych and I believe there is more to know ab0ut being, Alive.She was very clear, “I don’t do psychotherapy depending what you mean. . I described the difference between two of my psychs in Winnipeg and was fine

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REMEMBRANCE OF BOOKS PAST

December 24, 2021 The first 12 books that I remembered in the order I remembered them, revised. The first 12 books that I remembered in the order I remembered them, revised. The Bible – though I believe and say shit like “I’m such an atheist, I’m not an atheist,” and “God is dead, but sometimes

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GHOST-TOWNS IN WAITING

I was debating whether to use all caps; ghost-towns being too small, unworthy of ALL CAPS. A New Yorker reviewer used a fine bit of word play with allusions to place before it was empty. This phrase “ghost-town in waiting”  seems aptly suited to some-one like me,  my brain toying with undiagnosed  early stages of dementia.

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TIME TO MEDITATE

wrong time says the doctor not time nyet says doctor Jonathan Dr Jon Kabat Zinn from the MIT Mindfulness Meditation Body Scan side one victorenns9 is just another victor to the negative power and a nod to cutting his teeth on German and erasers. right yes there’s too much information for me and for you

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NOTES AS A CHANGING ROOM

PERSIST MANIFEST WORKING NOTES I take risks. I used to call myself a risk manager getting things done despite being afraid or taking a chances that could Adam coming back to fight. Dictating this my hands hurt too much I’m not quite sure where my brain is not as a premedicated but I want to

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IN THE TIME ZONE

INTO THE FUTURE  VOWELS LEADING THE WAY I before O, U! Episode 9 in the Abject Alphabet is brought to you by the letter I. I is for injury, for interloper, for infatuation, for imagination. For some impossible thing. For inspiration, I is my personal pronoun, except when I’m plural, which has been happening a

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WHAT AM I UP TOO?

I am distressed, as I believe chunks of my remembery are falling into the sea much sooneer than I allowed was poassible before moving to Kelowna to marry Michelle Hewitt. She, as we joked has “just MS” which is an unpredicatble disease, without a cure, but with manageable, (to a point) symptons. She drives and

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HARD TO SWALLOW

Swallowing is more important than getting dressed in the morning; and essentially connected to always breathing. My altered breathing at 4am alerted Michelle something was wrong. She tried to wake me and I was unresponsive so she called 911. Michelle saved my life, beginning a horrifying two weeks in the hands of our overworked health

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I LOVE MY WORK!

Try my first name as a password.  Kevin Nikkel tapes Rachel Braul who provides American Sign Language translation to improve the accessibility of this video. They did a great job. This was a test piece, and I’m looking forward to working with them on other pieces for LOOK show as a priority and on more

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